Is Displaying Portraits of Yourself Now Considered Narcissistic?

UPDATE: Miss Manners addresses an urgent etiquette query about displaying personal portraits in the home amid the rise of selfies and social media. As society evolves, the line between self-expression and narcissism is being redefined, leading many to question whether showcasing family portraits is appropriate in today’s culture.

In the Era of Selfies, the idea of framing and displaying professional portraits of oneself has come under scrutiny. One reader, reflecting on family traditions where grandparents adorned their homes with large-format portraits, wonders if doing the same today would be seen as narcissistic. The reader notes, “I don’t know anyone who has framed portraits of themselves in their homes now,” raising a poignant question about how personal expression is perceived in modern society.

Miss Manners responds, emphasizing that in today’s world, where social media flaunts personal images for all to see, framing a portrait is hardly egotistical. “Who will dare to raise the charge of narcissism?” she states. Instead, she suggests that rather than being an act of vanity, framed portraits can symbolize love and continuity, connecting generations through a shared appreciation of family.

The discussion extends into social gatherings, where etiquette around early arrivals at dinner parties is also highlighted. One reader recounts a stressful situation where guests arrived 45 minutes early, leaving her scrambling to prepare while they waited. Miss Manners’ advice? Guests should respect the host’s schedule, and hosts should ensure that early guests are comfortable while they finish preparing.

Additionally, a reader expressed concern over attending a 60th wedding anniversary party where the invitation explicitly stated “ABSOLUTELY NO GIFTS.” Miss Manners encourages heartfelt gestures, suggesting a simple yet meaningful letter of appreciation for the couple, emphasizing that personal sentiments often hold far greater value than material gifts.

WHY THIS MATTERS NOW: As the boundaries of personal expression shift, the etiquette of presenting oneself in artful ways is increasingly relevant. The evolution of social norms around self-presentation and the nuances of social gatherings demand our attention, especially as people seek to navigate relationships in an age of constant digital sharing.

As societal values continue to evolve, the implications of these discussions stretch far beyond the question of personal portraits. They reflect a broader cultural dialogue about authenticity, respect, and the importance of meaningful connections in our lives.

WHAT TO WATCH FOR: Readers are encouraged to consider their own practices of self-representation and the messages they send through their choices. With the rise of social media, the impact of perception and tradition is more immediate than ever.

Stay tuned for more insights from Miss Manners as she tackles the pressing questions of modern etiquette, helping us all to navigate this complex social landscape.